Spineless or Tactful?

One of the *benefits* of looking for work is having the opportunity to see a variety of different management styles, and to work on your interviewing skills. I believe I am getting progressively better at the whole process...the only hitch seems to come from the people I apply too. I say this with a certain sense of self-effacing humor...I know I am not perfect...but I think I am generally hirable, and whatever mistakes I may have made in the past I am not making currently when it comes to work--with full modesty, I'll tell you--I kick ass in my work place. I have the reviews to prove it.

Now, of course, I am not knocking managers of jobs that I apply for when I am not clearly qualified. A great example would be the job at ECCU...I wasn't particularly qualified for it and they filled it internally, so it wasn't overly discouraging.

But the jobs for which I am either perfectly qualified or even overly qualified...when I get treated bad while applying for those jobs, that's just kinda a kick in the teeth. I have had two great experiences applying for jobs...both of which have ended up with employment. I have had plenty of experiences where, in response to a very eager application by myself, potential employers were unreasonable...demeaning...uninterested...dismissive...and down right rude.

Which brings me to my ultimate question...as an applicant for a job...when is the general rudeness of a potential boss too much to stand, and when do you suck it up for the sake of an income?

For a *career* oriented position...How desperate do you have to be to accept the job from the person that makes you feel less than an intelligent adult? Is it worth it? Is a boss entitled to be rude to you (always assuming its not abuse in the work-place)? More importantly, when applying for a job, how much should your decisions be influenced by the behavior of your potential boss? Do you judge the book by its cover, having nothing else to go by?

It seems idealistic, to say that while they consider you, you consider them. It rarely works out that way...I have actually had an experience with a job of that nature...it was wonderful, and I look forward to working with them in part because of how great it was to apply to work for them. But that was an enigma.

Most application processes are something much different. Its expected that demands will be made...but in several discussions of potential work situations I have had over the past several months...its not my work behavior that's being discussed. Its my life and my family's life. Potential employers are making pre-emptive demands on things unrelated to work...and treating me with dismissive disdain.

And I have to ask myself...first, where the hell do they get the nerve to make such demands...and second, how should I respond when I am in the position I am in (trying desperately to find provision for my family). When the money isn't good enough, I can turn them down with a clear conscience...but when the money is enough to make the position tempting...where does dignity factor into finding a job? I cannot be happy if I cannot provide for my family...but then again, I feel like less than a man when I take a job with people that treat me like less than one.

So...are you being tactful when you ignore the humiliation your employer (and sometimes merely potential employer) heaps upon you in the course of your interaction with them? Or are you being spineless?

My wife says "No one can make you feel small except yourself." Which, I suppose, is a truism. Its just difficult to be lectured on the amount of respect expected from you should you be allowed to work for an organization, but to receive little or no respect yourself.

Perhaps its merely pride that urges me to reject their *opening* and throw their repulsive manners in their face. Nothing seems more satisfying sometimes than the thought of being rude to rude people. Man's justice in its prime.

Today I sat through an "interview" which was humilating in its absurdity. To say I don't take my potential employer seriously after meeting with them today would be an understatement. Every problem I had with the arrangement with the GLC this new place has...only they have those problems on steroids and they're looking for a fight. To say I was an after thought as I sat in their office trying to be interviewed would also be a gross understatement. I loathe the very thought of having to work for this organization...but I might have to.

I am not certain what frustrates me more...having to apply to work for people that have such poor management skills (yet, defying logic, are the managers), or the thought that I might have to take the job, even after finding out all that about them.

Sigh.

I'll keep looking and pray to God that I might avoid a year of agonizing in that place. Still...if this is the road that lays before us...its the road the Lord has promised to walk with us on. There is comfort in that.

This next year will not be an easy one...and as Summer pushes on, the question of what the Fall will look like weighs heavily upon me. My blogging has ended with prayers more and more, if you've noticed. I have been learning the need of prayer. The time has come to end this post.

Lord Jesus keep us. We are lost without Your hand to guide us and we are overwhlemed unless You sustain us.