Where the rain gets in, and stops my mind from wandering...where it will go...
I wish it would rain. We need rain. Washington D.C. has rain. I wish some of it would come our way. I imagine they do too...
Bonus points if you know the song from whence I got my title. Not many bonus points...it is, after all, one from the greatest band ever (to be referenced as GBE from now on...maybe I should post about them? hmmm...) but bonus points nonetheless.
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Why Not Me? Why Not Now?
These are the standard questions one asks oneself when setting out to make a fortune. After all, we are told, the money's out there...why shouldn't you get some of it? Why wait? Get out there and make your money work for you! Seize the day! Actualize your potential! Be your own boss!
Yes well, I have heard this all and I am sure you have too. I have even tried various options to make this our reality. In the process of trying to become independently wealthy, I started to consider the nature of wealth. All wealth comes from one source, of course. So I started to pray, as I hadn't since I was a little kid who thought things were very, very simple, that God would grant us the success we longed for. I promised Him service regardless of our fortunes, but I promised specifically that should He see fit to grant us the means, we would not use the money only for ourselves, but to further the work of the Kingdom. After all, as MK's, Sheri and I know all too well the needs of families struggling to do fulltime ministry and maintain support for their basic needs. Who better to entrust with a fortune than MK's, who know intimately very good ways to use the money? So I asked...after all, there are times when we have not because we ask not.
Well, as you may or may not know, my plan did not work. Needless to say, Sheri and I are presently not on any track, to the best of my knowledge, that will enable us to be clear of our own debts any time soon, let alone fully fund missionaries around the world. Honestly, this was disappointing. But we move on and keep working...after all, the commitment we had made to God was faithfulness regardless of circumstance. But every now and then, I have wondered why...why wouldn't God give His children an abundance of wealth? We could do so much with it...why is it withheld?
Well, as so often happens, I was in church this Sunday and an answer to this question was spoken to me in the midst of the sermon. You see, the sermon this week was one of those difficult ones...dealing with the financial status of the church, and the plans to grow their ministries and facilities and the financial needs that are incorporated with those moves. Our Pastor did a very good job of showing how this very practical issue was in fact a very direct part of the life and ministry of the church--which is hard. I was a Pastor's kid before I was a Missionary's kid, and I know. When the talk turns to the checkbook, people get uncomfortable. But its important. There's not a separation between the spiritual life and worship and the financial life of the church. Our church deals with a lot of money...but (despite the best efforts of televagelists to pervert this) those funds are as much a part of the worship as the praise songs. They don't go to the Pastor's private comfort...they go to enhancing our abilities to positively change our community for Christ. Its a big deal, and its important that it be handled with care.
Well, as I listened to the sermon, I started to have the old discussion with the Lord..."Lord, why don't you give me the money to help them? I would...wouldn't it be a great praise to Your name if I (or even just *somebody*) would give the church the total sum that they need for the project before them, and instruct the church to use all the funds they had raised for the project for ministry? Wouldn't that be a good use of Your gifts?"
And as I sat and asked this question, a voice answered me...
"No Chris; that's not the way things work. If I could just give you the money to take care of them, don't you think I could just give them the money they need? The point isn't getting them the money...they are learning faith and trust and understanding a little more of My great nature by having to wait for it to come as they need it, just as you are learning to depend on me for your needs by not having everything you want given instantly to you. Of course I could do it, but then the lesson would have been missed, and their joy would be less than full. Its not about the money Chris...its about teaching all of you about Me."
It was a moment of clarity. I felt a peace I hadn't before. Of course. So obvious and simple, naturally I was too short-sighted to realize it.
Lord, grant me mercy when I presume to know the best way for my life and even for others.
Yes well, I have heard this all and I am sure you have too. I have even tried various options to make this our reality. In the process of trying to become independently wealthy, I started to consider the nature of wealth. All wealth comes from one source, of course. So I started to pray, as I hadn't since I was a little kid who thought things were very, very simple, that God would grant us the success we longed for. I promised Him service regardless of our fortunes, but I promised specifically that should He see fit to grant us the means, we would not use the money only for ourselves, but to further the work of the Kingdom. After all, as MK's, Sheri and I know all too well the needs of families struggling to do fulltime ministry and maintain support for their basic needs. Who better to entrust with a fortune than MK's, who know intimately very good ways to use the money? So I asked...after all, there are times when we have not because we ask not.
Well, as you may or may not know, my plan did not work. Needless to say, Sheri and I are presently not on any track, to the best of my knowledge, that will enable us to be clear of our own debts any time soon, let alone fully fund missionaries around the world. Honestly, this was disappointing. But we move on and keep working...after all, the commitment we had made to God was faithfulness regardless of circumstance. But every now and then, I have wondered why...why wouldn't God give His children an abundance of wealth? We could do so much with it...why is it withheld?
Well, as so often happens, I was in church this Sunday and an answer to this question was spoken to me in the midst of the sermon. You see, the sermon this week was one of those difficult ones...dealing with the financial status of the church, and the plans to grow their ministries and facilities and the financial needs that are incorporated with those moves. Our Pastor did a very good job of showing how this very practical issue was in fact a very direct part of the life and ministry of the church--which is hard. I was a Pastor's kid before I was a Missionary's kid, and I know. When the talk turns to the checkbook, people get uncomfortable. But its important. There's not a separation between the spiritual life and worship and the financial life of the church. Our church deals with a lot of money...but (despite the best efforts of televagelists to pervert this) those funds are as much a part of the worship as the praise songs. They don't go to the Pastor's private comfort...they go to enhancing our abilities to positively change our community for Christ. Its a big deal, and its important that it be handled with care.
Well, as I listened to the sermon, I started to have the old discussion with the Lord..."Lord, why don't you give me the money to help them? I would...wouldn't it be a great praise to Your name if I (or even just *somebody*) would give the church the total sum that they need for the project before them, and instruct the church to use all the funds they had raised for the project for ministry? Wouldn't that be a good use of Your gifts?"
And as I sat and asked this question, a voice answered me...
"No Chris; that's not the way things work. If I could just give you the money to take care of them, don't you think I could just give them the money they need? The point isn't getting them the money...they are learning faith and trust and understanding a little more of My great nature by having to wait for it to come as they need it, just as you are learning to depend on me for your needs by not having everything you want given instantly to you. Of course I could do it, but then the lesson would have been missed, and their joy would be less than full. Its not about the money Chris...its about teaching all of you about Me."
It was a moment of clarity. I felt a peace I hadn't before. Of course. So obvious and simple, naturally I was too short-sighted to realize it.
Lord, grant me mercy when I presume to know the best way for my life and even for others.
Monday, June 26, 2006
All Things New
Change, for the sake of change, is not necessarily a good thing. However, there are instances in which change is exactly what is needed, whether its to prevent a familiar thing from becoming mundane, or to make my blog more interesting to look at.
Well, clearly I have changed this here blog-o-mine. I hope the new color scheme is to your liking...whoever *you* are, be you friends, strangers, or people who just cannot win an argument and so read my blog. Welcome to the new Isle!
Well, clearly I have changed this here blog-o-mine. I hope the new color scheme is to your liking...whoever *you* are, be you friends, strangers, or people who just cannot win an argument and so read my blog. Welcome to the new Isle!
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Wowsa that was good!
Dieting can be a real irritating process. Seasons change and holidays and events arise...its hard to stay on track.
We haven't. And its frustrating. Not that we've lost all the ground we gained, but its hard to get back into the mindset. Getting your gameface on, so to speak.
Its especially hard when you find a new treat in your own neighborhood. Something with as much charm and quality as, say, Panera. I heard about this new local bakery/cafe from a friend's blog. We decided to give it try.
For $8 Sheri and I had our fill of a very good sandwhich and salad combo, and even eenjoyed free samples of one of their pizzas (they are new, so I guess they are introducing themselves to the neighborhood by way of generosity...always a sign of a business that's come to play!) I highly recommend it. Its fantastic food, and the atmosphere is great. For the genre that its competing in, I'd rate it a solid 9...with Starbucks scoring about a 7.5. If you're near a Panera, go to it. Now! Go!
We haven't. And its frustrating. Not that we've lost all the ground we gained, but its hard to get back into the mindset. Getting your gameface on, so to speak.
Its especially hard when you find a new treat in your own neighborhood. Something with as much charm and quality as, say, Panera. I heard about this new local bakery/cafe from a friend's blog. We decided to give it try.
For $8 Sheri and I had our fill of a very good sandwhich and salad combo, and even eenjoyed free samples of one of their pizzas (they are new, so I guess they are introducing themselves to the neighborhood by way of generosity...always a sign of a business that's come to play!) I highly recommend it. Its fantastic food, and the atmosphere is great. For the genre that its competing in, I'd rate it a solid 9...with Starbucks scoring about a 7.5. If you're near a Panera, go to it. Now! Go!
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Stagehand?
I am looking at getting a job as a Stagehand at the La Mirada Theatre as a supplemental job to the teaching position. If I got it...I would be leading a trip to D.C., coaching wrestling, teaching history and working in a theatre...isn't work supposed to be unpleasant?
A dilemma of faith
As a disclaimer right up front...none of this is intended to be judgemental or divisive. I am not an Anglican, so I have not felt it appropriate to comment in discussions with my Anglicans friends on what I think about the current situation...but I do have thoughts, and this being my blog, I thought it would be appropriate to air my thoughts out here. They are not limited to the question the Anglican church faces at present...that church is merely the best example right now. I've posted about this before. I recognize that I cannot give all opinions a fair hearing in my summations...I am just trying to consider what I see happening as best I can.
I have several friends that attend the Anglican Church that Sheri and I used to attend. Its a great church, though it seems to be quite solitary amidst the storms that are currently racking the Episcopal communion. For those of you that don't know, and don't care to read the articles, essentially the new leading Bishop of the ECUSA is a woman from Nevada, who is staunchly in support of homosexuality.
So much so, that the Anglican Bishop of Rochester, Michael Nazir-Ali, has suggested that the issue of electing a homosexual to the position of Bishop will look like "an interesting footnote" in comparison to the agenda that comes with this newly selected leader. He, and other conservatives of the church, are demanding actions be taken by the Archbishop of Canterbury, Rowan Williams. It looks more and more as if a split truly will occur and rend the conservative elements from the liberal in the Anglican/Episcopalian communions.
Now, this is unquestionably a sad thing. That any church should get to this point, in a battle with its own leadership for its very soul, is a tragedy indeed. Yet the issue of "schism" is a very serious one, and the question of how this will resolve itself is dreaded by many who fear that the only solution will be a split.
Here is my problem...I do not understand how "breaking" with a woman that holds her own philosophy over what is plainly said in the word of God is anything less than what we do with any other person who is in fact lauding a falsehood as truth. We recognize that there is a separation between us and them...not to keep them at arm's length, but to make it plain that they do not speak for the true followers of Christ.
If property rights come up as a result...so be it. But that cannot be the basis for action or inaction.
Neither can the question of standing for the right, even if it means separating, revolve around whether or not it makes people like us.
And it certainly cannot revolve around the question of the authority of the individuals of the church to stand and reject those in authority, if and when they (those in authority) have lost their way.
The authority of the church resides in its continued faithfulness to the word of God. If that fades, so does the authority of the church, and regardless of the title that precedes someone's name, any Christian founded in the word of God may and should challenge someone who is claiming to be representatives of God's word while ignoring the teachings found within.
I don't think peace and unity are to be cast aside with reckless abandon. But neither do I think you should hold tightly to the name of a church or denomination when that church or denomination has lost its way. All are either followers of Christ or they are merely lost and dying. You say you follow Paul, I say Peter...but both Peter and Paul had better be following Christ or its all for naught; and if either of them isn't following Christ then we should challenge them and if they won't repent we take on the lead, letting them lay where they fell.
Redemption for those that choose heresy over the truth is possible...but that cannot compromise the mission of the Church, which (whatever name it goes by) is to stand as a light of Christ's truth, love, justice & mercy. You cannot be a light when those that share your name are continually dragging the light through the mud and the mire.
I realize that there are always conflicts within the Church. Stupid people do stupid things all the time that shame the name of Christ. I know I have! But this is a specific instance where the lines should be clear: liberals in the Anglican church would see the leadership evolve the church into something it is not. If the leaders won't repent, they can no longer lead. If they say you have abandoned the church and cannot call yourselves members of that body any longer, so be it. They have left the faith, and are not a part of Christ's Body. But a middle ground is unacceptable. The time comes to separate the wheat from the chaff. Human institutions fade away; the only ties that truly bind are eternal in nature and they don't revolve around institutions or manmade systems.
Sigh. I have concluded, as I have said earlier, that I am not an Anglican. I am a Protestant Evangelical. Perhaps I cannot appreciate this problem to its fullest extent. I know that there are problems (deep seeded problems) with the Protestant traditions...there are reasons there are multiple forms of the Baptist church! Still, I don't think that you must live with one sickness to avoid the other. I think its possible to stand and even divide over the right issues if need be, and not devolve into a chaotic and schism filled mess. If the Lord is leading, I must believe that by breaking with those that have abandoned Him, you will prosper. I know I have seen that to be true in my parent's lives.
I am praying for my brothers and sisters that are facing this test. It is a difficult time and I don't envy their choice. May God be glorified in spite of us, and may we follow after Him in spite of ourselves.
If you read this and you're involved in this discussion actively...I hope you understand the spirit it was written in. I don't think this is a pleasant choice to have to make. I just think there is a clearly right and a clearly wrong option. That probably sounds naive. When are things black and white, right or wrong? I guess, I think they enter that place when it comes down to the presence of truth...is it there or not? I have said before, I am a truth person; I value truth over most things. Perhaps that's a fault...I like to hope that I value truth and use it to give me insight into how best to love and achieve peace...but I know what I am and what I have a tendency to be. This new presiding Bishop has forsaken the truth, claiming its in the name of love. That's the sign...its black and white. Speak and stand for the Truth in Love...if that costs Peace, that is the price. Peace in this world is not the goal.
I have several friends that attend the Anglican Church that Sheri and I used to attend. Its a great church, though it seems to be quite solitary amidst the storms that are currently racking the Episcopal communion. For those of you that don't know, and don't care to read the articles, essentially the new leading Bishop of the ECUSA is a woman from Nevada, who is staunchly in support of homosexuality.
Reuters/AP
21, June 2006
WASHINGTON -- Newly elected leader of the US Episcopal Church Bishop Katharine Jefferts Schori said yesterday she believed homosexuality was no sin and homosexuals were created by God to love people of the same gender.
The bishop of the Diocese of Nevada was elected Monday as the first woman leader of the 2.3 million-member US branch of the worldwide Anglican Communion.
Interviewed on CNN, Bishop Jefferts Schori was asked if it was a sin to be homosexual.
"I don't believe so. I believe that God creates us with different gifts. Each one of us comes into this world with a different collection of things that challenge us and things that give us joy and allow us to bless the world around us," she said.
"Some people come into this world with affections ordered toward other people of the same gender and some people come into this world with affections directed at people of the other gender."
Bishop Jefferts Schori's election seemed certain to exacerbate splits within an Episcopal church that is already deeply divided over homosexuality, with several dioceses and parishes threatening to break away.
So much so, that the Anglican Bishop of Rochester, Michael Nazir-Ali, has suggested that the issue of electing a homosexual to the position of Bishop will look like "an interesting footnote" in comparison to the agenda that comes with this newly selected leader. He, and other conservatives of the church, are demanding actions be taken by the Archbishop of Canterbury, Rowan Williams. It looks more and more as if a split truly will occur and rend the conservative elements from the liberal in the Anglican/Episcopalian communions.
Now, this is unquestionably a sad thing. That any church should get to this point, in a battle with its own leadership for its very soul, is a tragedy indeed. Yet the issue of "schism" is a very serious one, and the question of how this will resolve itself is dreaded by many who fear that the only solution will be a split.
Here is my problem...I do not understand how "breaking" with a woman that holds her own philosophy over what is plainly said in the word of God is anything less than what we do with any other person who is in fact lauding a falsehood as truth. We recognize that there is a separation between us and them...not to keep them at arm's length, but to make it plain that they do not speak for the true followers of Christ.
If property rights come up as a result...so be it. But that cannot be the basis for action or inaction.
Neither can the question of standing for the right, even if it means separating, revolve around whether or not it makes people like us.
And it certainly cannot revolve around the question of the authority of the individuals of the church to stand and reject those in authority, if and when they (those in authority) have lost their way.
The authority of the church resides in its continued faithfulness to the word of God. If that fades, so does the authority of the church, and regardless of the title that precedes someone's name, any Christian founded in the word of God may and should challenge someone who is claiming to be representatives of God's word while ignoring the teachings found within.
I don't think peace and unity are to be cast aside with reckless abandon. But neither do I think you should hold tightly to the name of a church or denomination when that church or denomination has lost its way. All are either followers of Christ or they are merely lost and dying. You say you follow Paul, I say Peter...but both Peter and Paul had better be following Christ or its all for naught; and if either of them isn't following Christ then we should challenge them and if they won't repent we take on the lead, letting them lay where they fell.
Redemption for those that choose heresy over the truth is possible...but that cannot compromise the mission of the Church, which (whatever name it goes by) is to stand as a light of Christ's truth, love, justice & mercy. You cannot be a light when those that share your name are continually dragging the light through the mud and the mire.
I realize that there are always conflicts within the Church. Stupid people do stupid things all the time that shame the name of Christ. I know I have! But this is a specific instance where the lines should be clear: liberals in the Anglican church would see the leadership evolve the church into something it is not. If the leaders won't repent, they can no longer lead. If they say you have abandoned the church and cannot call yourselves members of that body any longer, so be it. They have left the faith, and are not a part of Christ's Body. But a middle ground is unacceptable. The time comes to separate the wheat from the chaff. Human institutions fade away; the only ties that truly bind are eternal in nature and they don't revolve around institutions or manmade systems.
Sigh. I have concluded, as I have said earlier, that I am not an Anglican. I am a Protestant Evangelical. Perhaps I cannot appreciate this problem to its fullest extent. I know that there are problems (deep seeded problems) with the Protestant traditions...there are reasons there are multiple forms of the Baptist church! Still, I don't think that you must live with one sickness to avoid the other. I think its possible to stand and even divide over the right issues if need be, and not devolve into a chaotic and schism filled mess. If the Lord is leading, I must believe that by breaking with those that have abandoned Him, you will prosper. I know I have seen that to be true in my parent's lives.
I am praying for my brothers and sisters that are facing this test. It is a difficult time and I don't envy their choice. May God be glorified in spite of us, and may we follow after Him in spite of ourselves.
If you read this and you're involved in this discussion actively...I hope you understand the spirit it was written in. I don't think this is a pleasant choice to have to make. I just think there is a clearly right and a clearly wrong option. That probably sounds naive. When are things black and white, right or wrong? I guess, I think they enter that place when it comes down to the presence of truth...is it there or not? I have said before, I am a truth person; I value truth over most things. Perhaps that's a fault...I like to hope that I value truth and use it to give me insight into how best to love and achieve peace...but I know what I am and what I have a tendency to be. This new presiding Bishop has forsaken the truth, claiming its in the name of love. That's the sign...its black and white. Speak and stand for the Truth in Love...if that costs Peace, that is the price. Peace in this world is not the goal.
Leaving On a Jet Plane
Well...in little less then a year from now...I will be...
See, I got a job teaching at this school. I'm their Middle School History teacher. I also cover 6th grade math...defying all my middle school and high school teacher's guesses as to what I would do when I got all growed up. Better still, every Monday and Tuesday from 2pm-3pm I will be teaching/coaching a wrestling elective. After 6 years I have finally found my way back to the mats, making me very happy indeed.
There are many things that make me happy about this position, as I have mentioned in previous posts. I am working with my old roomie and groomsman, Justin Rupple. I will have a permanent classroom to decorate, and my own desk (possibly my own office) away from the classroom. The wrestling is a big deal...my shoes have begun to despair of being used again. But most of all is the unexpected bonus...
you see...
every year...
the eighth graders...
have a trip...
to one of my favorite places in the world...
for ten days...
and come next March...
it will actually be part of my job...
for which they will actually be paying me...
to help oversee...
a trip to...
THE CITY OF WASHINGTON IN THE DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA!!!
The trip will include a visit to Jamestown (been there), Williamsburg (been there), Monticello (been there), Gettysburg (driven through it and looked at it as it passed by), and Philadephila (which I have never visited).
Since finding out about this incredible perk...I honestly haven't been able to think about much else. Its nearly a year away, but I feel like a kid the week before Christmas...it doesn't matter how long the wait is...when the waiting is done its going to be SOOOOO worth it!!!
This trip combines many of my favorite things in the world...I love being in places like Jamestown and Gettysburg...and I love traveling...I love staying in hotels...I love traveling with groups that get to experience amazing things together...and, of course, I love Washington D.C. Its possibly my favorite city in the world. Its the closest we have to old Europe in the New World, with monuments and marble everywhere. A testament to the enduring affect of buildings that are not merely practical, but are majestic.
Plus...as a history/politics buff, it only makes sense that I would gravitate towards the center of our nation's mind and history. Even though most things haven't happened there, they started there. And often, many things that happen elsewhere end up being celebrated there in museums or monuments. My dad used to take us to D.C. a lot...a lot. My memories are completely peppered by images of standing either in the spot where John Wilkes Booth ended the life of one of our greatest leaders and imagining what those moments of terror for everyone around Lincoln must have been like, or of standing in from of the ruined bones of the sunken ship in the Museum of American History, imagining what it would have been like to stand on the deck as the cannonballs ripped through the hull, or simply looking at the giant marble image of the giant man we knew as Honest Abe (I'm a Lincoln fan, if you haven't guessed). Its part of why I love history...it wasn't a text book, it was in front of me and I could let my imagination take flight at the thought of actually living in that moment in time.
I also love being in a city with a Metro that is effective. I love being in an East Coast city, where people are focused on life (they could stand to relax more...but its refreshing from the laid back nature of California). I just...love it all.
And I cannot get it out of my mind. I tell Sheri every couple of hours, just to make sure she understands...I am going to Washington D.C. If all my dreams come true someday I will have a job that involves working in that city...something in my field, of course. I could go be a janitor...but, well, lets just say that's not the dream.
Though my Dad recently told me that while he was in Bible college not 25 minutes (a metro ride) outside of D.C. in Maryland, he applied for a job as a night security guard of the Smithsonians. I'm like him...he's like me...that's a dream job, at least, for a single guy it is. Unlimited access to the museums, no crowds, D.C. at night. It doesn't get much better than that. He didn't get it...which, it turns out, was a good thing. He said he might have quit Bible school if that had come through. Life would have been very different indeed.
Oh...and also, I am looking forward to having one of my favorite slices of pizza, located at the back end of the food court under Union Station. Easily one of the best pizzas I've had, and one of the other special parts of the D.C. experience.
Ah. I am going to D.C. Rock ON.
See, I got a job teaching at this school. I'm their Middle School History teacher. I also cover 6th grade math...defying all my middle school and high school teacher's guesses as to what I would do when I got all growed up. Better still, every Monday and Tuesday from 2pm-3pm I will be teaching/coaching a wrestling elective. After 6 years I have finally found my way back to the mats, making me very happy indeed.
There are many things that make me happy about this position, as I have mentioned in previous posts. I am working with my old roomie and groomsman, Justin Rupple. I will have a permanent classroom to decorate, and my own desk (possibly my own office) away from the classroom. The wrestling is a big deal...my shoes have begun to despair of being used again. But most of all is the unexpected bonus...
you see...
every year...
the eighth graders...
have a trip...
to one of my favorite places in the world...
for ten days...
and come next March...
it will actually be part of my job...
for which they will actually be paying me...
to help oversee...
a trip to...
THE CITY OF WASHINGTON IN THE DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA!!!
The trip will include a visit to Jamestown (been there), Williamsburg (been there), Monticello (been there), Gettysburg (driven through it and looked at it as it passed by), and Philadephila (which I have never visited).
Since finding out about this incredible perk...I honestly haven't been able to think about much else. Its nearly a year away, but I feel like a kid the week before Christmas...it doesn't matter how long the wait is...when the waiting is done its going to be SOOOOO worth it!!!
This trip combines many of my favorite things in the world...I love being in places like Jamestown and Gettysburg...and I love traveling...I love staying in hotels...I love traveling with groups that get to experience amazing things together...and, of course, I love Washington D.C. Its possibly my favorite city in the world. Its the closest we have to old Europe in the New World, with monuments and marble everywhere. A testament to the enduring affect of buildings that are not merely practical, but are majestic.
Plus...as a history/politics buff, it only makes sense that I would gravitate towards the center of our nation's mind and history. Even though most things haven't happened there, they started there. And often, many things that happen elsewhere end up being celebrated there in museums or monuments. My dad used to take us to D.C. a lot...a lot. My memories are completely peppered by images of standing either in the spot where John Wilkes Booth ended the life of one of our greatest leaders and imagining what those moments of terror for everyone around Lincoln must have been like, or of standing in from of the ruined bones of the sunken ship in the Museum of American History, imagining what it would have been like to stand on the deck as the cannonballs ripped through the hull, or simply looking at the giant marble image of the giant man we knew as Honest Abe (I'm a Lincoln fan, if you haven't guessed). Its part of why I love history...it wasn't a text book, it was in front of me and I could let my imagination take flight at the thought of actually living in that moment in time.
I also love being in a city with a Metro that is effective. I love being in an East Coast city, where people are focused on life (they could stand to relax more...but its refreshing from the laid back nature of California). I just...love it all.
And I cannot get it out of my mind. I tell Sheri every couple of hours, just to make sure she understands...I am going to Washington D.C. If all my dreams come true someday I will have a job that involves working in that city...something in my field, of course. I could go be a janitor...but, well, lets just say that's not the dream.
Though my Dad recently told me that while he was in Bible college not 25 minutes (a metro ride) outside of D.C. in Maryland, he applied for a job as a night security guard of the Smithsonians. I'm like him...he's like me...that's a dream job, at least, for a single guy it is. Unlimited access to the museums, no crowds, D.C. at night. It doesn't get much better than that. He didn't get it...which, it turns out, was a good thing. He said he might have quit Bible school if that had come through. Life would have been very different indeed.
Oh...and also, I am looking forward to having one of my favorite slices of pizza, located at the back end of the food court under Union Station. Easily one of the best pizzas I've had, and one of the other special parts of the D.C. experience.
Ah. I am going to D.C. Rock ON.
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Young At Heart
Being a father has interesting affects.
Some days I have never felt quite so old. I am only 23, yet I am nearly constantly tired...a feature I have noticed goes hand-in-hand with being the parent of a toddler. I also don't bother getting dressed up for most things...Sheri and I managed a date the other day for our Anniversary (thanks Becka!) and it was the first time when it wasn't for church that we got moderately snazy looking. And dates come with increasingly less frequency. Money is almost not a concern; we don't have the time. Dates, real dates, where we go out by ourselves and do whatever we like...those happen maybe once every 4 months or so. I want to change that rule though...our last one revived us so much we were amazed.
There are those days.
Then there are other days.
Some days I haven't felt this truly young since I was, well, young. When I could do anything physically, when my time was my own (provided home work was taken care of) and when there were still fresh wonders to be discovered in this old world. I remember hanging off the back of a Jeetney, relishing the feel of the wind and singing, or walking on the shores of beaches around the world and looking out at the horizon and trying to understand the immense power of nature while playing in the waves. I remember visiting zoos and aquariums for the first time, seeing animals that were strange and wonderful, like tigers, exotic birds and sharks.
And as I watch my son grow, I taste these experiences again.
His latest delight is birds. He loves birds. Whenever we leave the house he immediately turns his gaze to the sky and points at the birds flying overhead. His clear, high voice joyfully recognizes them as "Ba!" and his eyes are full of the light of life as he traces their flight across the sky. He'll hold his hands together and swing from side to side because his exhilaration is too much to contain.
The other day, some sparrows that had made their nest in the awnings of our apartment building were having a big day. Their hatchlings were learning to fly. One of them was on the ground as Aiden and I came home. We came to see what was going on. The young sparrow couldn't quite fly yet, so he hopped around trying to avoid the large intruders. We watched him for a moment, and Aiden couldn't stop smiling and whispering his secret to himself "There's a BIRD right there and its not flying away!!!" At least, that's what it sounded like to me.
My son keeps me young even as he makes me feel and, in truth, grow older.
Some days I have never felt quite so old. I am only 23, yet I am nearly constantly tired...a feature I have noticed goes hand-in-hand with being the parent of a toddler. I also don't bother getting dressed up for most things...Sheri and I managed a date the other day for our Anniversary (thanks Becka!) and it was the first time when it wasn't for church that we got moderately snazy looking. And dates come with increasingly less frequency. Money is almost not a concern; we don't have the time. Dates, real dates, where we go out by ourselves and do whatever we like...those happen maybe once every 4 months or so. I want to change that rule though...our last one revived us so much we were amazed.
There are those days.
Then there are other days.
Some days I haven't felt this truly young since I was, well, young. When I could do anything physically, when my time was my own (provided home work was taken care of) and when there were still fresh wonders to be discovered in this old world. I remember hanging off the back of a Jeetney, relishing the feel of the wind and singing, or walking on the shores of beaches around the world and looking out at the horizon and trying to understand the immense power of nature while playing in the waves. I remember visiting zoos and aquariums for the first time, seeing animals that were strange and wonderful, like tigers, exotic birds and sharks.
And as I watch my son grow, I taste these experiences again.
His latest delight is birds. He loves birds. Whenever we leave the house he immediately turns his gaze to the sky and points at the birds flying overhead. His clear, high voice joyfully recognizes them as "Ba!" and his eyes are full of the light of life as he traces their flight across the sky. He'll hold his hands together and swing from side to side because his exhilaration is too much to contain.
The other day, some sparrows that had made their nest in the awnings of our apartment building were having a big day. Their hatchlings were learning to fly. One of them was on the ground as Aiden and I came home. We came to see what was going on. The young sparrow couldn't quite fly yet, so he hopped around trying to avoid the large intruders. We watched him for a moment, and Aiden couldn't stop smiling and whispering his secret to himself "There's a BIRD right there and its not flying away!!!" At least, that's what it sounded like to me.
My son keeps me young even as he makes me feel and, in truth, grow older.
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
3 years
I would be remiss if, having a blog, I did not use it to make note of a historical event. This is our third anniversary. Three years of marital bliss.
It has only gotten better. Thank you God, for blessing our marriage and for protecting us from ourselves. Without you, Lord, this endeavor would have failed before it began. But by Your gracious goodness, I am married to a beautiful and Godly woman, who is truly my match. Thank you Lord.
Oh, and happy flag day everybody else.
It has only gotten better. Thank you God, for blessing our marriage and for protecting us from ourselves. Without you, Lord, this endeavor would have failed before it began. But by Your gracious goodness, I am married to a beautiful and Godly woman, who is truly my match. Thank you Lord.
Oh, and happy flag day everybody else.
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
Could you please?
Yes, please, just jam this sharp object up into my eye. Oh yeah, that's the stuff. The blinding pain totally blocks out your voice. I feel much better now.
Well, maybe its not quite that bad...but almost.
Mark Y Mark have struck again. Two Marks, talking online (Bubbs) about a variety of political/social/even theological issues continue to awe me with their lack of compassion and etiquette. One of these was the one that branded me a liberal, and the other is the one that likes to use big arguments to say simple things that are incoherant even when said simply.
I am at my wit's end.
I have to believe that its possible to hold traditional, conservative views without being represented by people that enjoy eating dinner while watching pictures of Zarqawi's corpse on T.V.
Sigh.
On a plus side...the joint attacks of Puck and I continue. Its might almost be a little creepy if it wasn't so much fun and encouraging. We disagree, but not enough that either of us has lost our minds, and when arguing with people like Mark Y Mark we get to appreciate the other's opinions, which in many ways compliment our own. That's a really good thing I think. If we could convince more politicians to try it our country might be a better place.
Well, maybe its not quite that bad...but almost.
Mark Y Mark have struck again. Two Marks, talking online (Bubbs) about a variety of political/social/even theological issues continue to awe me with their lack of compassion and etiquette. One of these was the one that branded me a
I am at my wit's end.
I have to believe that its possible to hold traditional, conservative views without being represented by people that enjoy eating dinner while watching pictures of Zarqawi's corpse on T.V.
Sigh.
On a plus side...the joint attacks of Puck and I continue. Its might almost be a little creepy if it wasn't so much fun and encouraging. We disagree, but not enough that either of us has lost our minds, and when arguing with people like Mark Y Mark we get to appreciate the other's opinions, which in many ways compliment our own. That's a really good thing I think. If we could convince more politicians to try it our country might be a better place.
Friday, June 02, 2006
Martyrdom
I just finished watching The Mission, a 1986 movie with Robert De Niro, Jeremy Irons, and even a young Liam Neeson (on a brief side note...Liam...such a cool name. If only my last name wasn't "Leigh"...Aiden might have been named Liam, but "Liam Leigh" just doesn't sound quite right...its short for William, so its still a possibility, but I dunno...).
This was a good movie. If you haven't seen it and don't want to know anything about it...stop reading. Now. I am not responsible for spoiling the movie after this point.
Briefly, it takes place in the context of the 18th century, and the Jesuits in South America are fighting with Portugal and Spain over the territory of their missions in the new world. In the process, the stories of two very different men are told. One, a Jesuit Priest (Irons) who founded the newest mission in the midst of Indians who had martyred one of his fellow Jesuits at the very beginning of the movie. The other (De Niro) is a mercenary and a slaver who evenutally becomes a Jesuit. As the conflict comes to a climax, and the missions are to be destroyed and the Indians must flee or be enslaved or killed, the question arises between these two men...what is the appropriate response for Godly men to this problem.
The Priest says to love. The Mercenary says to fight. Both men die. The Priest leads the Indians that don't fight (mostly women and children) in worship until they are gunned down at they sings praises. The Mercenary fights to the end, and gets himself killed trying to save children from the slaughter.
Now, clearly, one question this movies asks is on the nature of love and mercy and justice. Before the final conflict, the Priest denies his blessing to the Mercenary, saying that if "Might makes Right, then perhaps there is no place for Love in this earth". That is a huge question...is there no relation between love and might? But I digress. More directly stated (and more central to the inspiration of this post) is the question of martyrdom.
What does it mean to be a martyr?
Honestly, this story, like the story of Jim Elliot and Nate Saint, makes me wonder where the line is between martyrdom and suicide. Is there a line at all, or is martyrdom merely sanctioned suicide? You allow yourself to die as a martyr, though you might have avoided that end by making different choices along the way...how do we know those choices are the right ones?
Are you a martyr when you stand for your faith and die as a result? Would that disqualify the Mercenary, who did not stand to meet his death, but fought back, as a martyr?
Are you a martyr when you choose to choose death? If you could avoid death without tainting your testimony...should you? Clearly, the message a man sends when he relinquishes freely that which we prize above all other things (the brief period here we call life) is powerful...and even if he could survive without tainting his testimony, the echo of the martyr's message is often more powerful than the words he spoke while alive.
This sparks an internal debate within me...
I have to wonder how we can justify chosing the time and place of our deaths? I know this might be simplifying the issue...but it seems to me that men that *choose* to become martyrs are skipping a step...isn't that supposed to be something forced on them?
I counter myself, saying that they aren't "choosing death", but merely choosing to accept it as it comes.
That is true, I tell myself. Yet when you willingly go the place of death, or when you walk out to be shot at...aren't you choosing deliberately to die?
Still, I come back again, did Paul choose death or obedience? He went to Jerusalem, despite direct warnings that in so doing he would ultimately end his life. Surely his martyrdom was pure service to Christ, not tainted with personal ambition. Neither was it suicide--he died in service to God.
I think the bold "me" is more convincing than the italic "me".
This reminds me of the discussion of courage from Laches. "What is courage? Is it courage when you feel no fear?"
Is it martyrdom when you need not die? Or is that what makes it martyrdom? Is it, by its very nature, a unnecessary sacrifice for something greater than your own life? Is this difficult quality the thing that separates it from other sacrificial deaths, such as those that die in battle for others?
I thought a lot about this while studying at Torrey Berkeley in the Summer of 2004 and reading Foxe's Book of Martyrs. Its a good question, I think, to think on.
This was a good movie. If you haven't seen it and don't want to know anything about it...stop reading. Now. I am not responsible for spoiling the movie after this point.
Briefly, it takes place in the context of the 18th century, and the Jesuits in South America are fighting with Portugal and Spain over the territory of their missions in the new world. In the process, the stories of two very different men are told. One, a Jesuit Priest (Irons) who founded the newest mission in the midst of Indians who had martyred one of his fellow Jesuits at the very beginning of the movie. The other (De Niro) is a mercenary and a slaver who evenutally becomes a Jesuit. As the conflict comes to a climax, and the missions are to be destroyed and the Indians must flee or be enslaved or killed, the question arises between these two men...what is the appropriate response for Godly men to this problem.
The Priest says to love. The Mercenary says to fight. Both men die. The Priest leads the Indians that don't fight (mostly women and children) in worship until they are gunned down at they sings praises. The Mercenary fights to the end, and gets himself killed trying to save children from the slaughter.
Now, clearly, one question this movies asks is on the nature of love and mercy and justice. Before the final conflict, the Priest denies his blessing to the Mercenary, saying that if "Might makes Right, then perhaps there is no place for Love in this earth". That is a huge question...is there no relation between love and might? But I digress. More directly stated (and more central to the inspiration of this post) is the question of martyrdom.
What does it mean to be a martyr?
Honestly, this story, like the story of Jim Elliot and Nate Saint, makes me wonder where the line is between martyrdom and suicide. Is there a line at all, or is martyrdom merely sanctioned suicide? You allow yourself to die as a martyr, though you might have avoided that end by making different choices along the way...how do we know those choices are the right ones?
Are you a martyr when you stand for your faith and die as a result? Would that disqualify the Mercenary, who did not stand to meet his death, but fought back, as a martyr?
Are you a martyr when you choose to choose death? If you could avoid death without tainting your testimony...should you? Clearly, the message a man sends when he relinquishes freely that which we prize above all other things (the brief period here we call life) is powerful...and even if he could survive without tainting his testimony, the echo of the martyr's message is often more powerful than the words he spoke while alive.
This sparks an internal debate within me...
I have to wonder how we can justify chosing the time and place of our deaths? I know this might be simplifying the issue...but it seems to me that men that *choose* to become martyrs are skipping a step...isn't that supposed to be something forced on them?
I counter myself, saying that they aren't "choosing death", but merely choosing to accept it as it comes.
That is true, I tell myself. Yet when you willingly go the place of death, or when you walk out to be shot at...aren't you choosing deliberately to die?
Still, I come back again, did Paul choose death or obedience? He went to Jerusalem, despite direct warnings that in so doing he would ultimately end his life. Surely his martyrdom was pure service to Christ, not tainted with personal ambition. Neither was it suicide--he died in service to God.
I think the bold "me" is more convincing than the italic "me".
This reminds me of the discussion of courage from Laches. "What is courage? Is it courage when you feel no fear?"
Is it martyrdom when you need not die? Or is that what makes it martyrdom? Is it, by its very nature, a unnecessary sacrifice for something greater than your own life? Is this difficult quality the thing that separates it from other sacrificial deaths, such as those that die in battle for others?
I thought a lot about this while studying at Torrey Berkeley in the Summer of 2004 and reading Foxe's Book of Martyrs. Its a good question, I think, to think on.
You know you're a Dad when...
...Sesame Street invades your dreams.
I dreamed that, among others, Elmo (who I don't even like!) and Big Bird and Ernie were having an adventure. Letters of the Day were involved, as well as a game of "Journey to Ernie"...
The first time in almost...20 years(?) that that has happened to me. A little disturbing.
But it makes me happy that Sesame Street is Aiden's favorite show. He doesn't like cartoons. He doesn't like the hippy-kids show "Its a Big Big World" (on this show, they actually say things like "Well if it feels good, it can't be wrong!" and teach kids evolution...an evil show with puppets). He DOESN'T like Barney (YAY!)!
Just Sesame Street. I need to try and track down the old Sesame Street movies, before the Elmo invasion (I loathe Elmo...he's the closest thing to ruining Sesame Street)...things like "Follow That Bird!" & "Big Bird in China" & "Big Bird in Japan".
Maybe I'm still riding high on rediscovering childhood favorites...but one of my goals for this Summer is to track down these movies and have them ready for Aiden to enjoy. He'll enjoy them, and until he can...I, apparently, am really enjoying Sesame Street's re-entrance into my life.
You know you're a Dad when, right?
I dreamed that, among others, Elmo (who I don't even like!) and Big Bird and Ernie were having an adventure. Letters of the Day were involved, as well as a game of "Journey to Ernie"...
The first time in almost...20 years(?) that that has happened to me. A little disturbing.
But it makes me happy that Sesame Street is Aiden's favorite show. He doesn't like cartoons. He doesn't like the hippy-kids show "Its a Big Big World" (on this show, they actually say things like "Well if it feels good, it can't be wrong!" and teach kids evolution...an evil show with puppets). He DOESN'T like Barney (YAY!)!
Just Sesame Street. I need to try and track down the old Sesame Street movies, before the Elmo invasion (I loathe Elmo...he's the closest thing to ruining Sesame Street)...things like "Follow That Bird!" & "Big Bird in China" & "Big Bird in Japan".
Maybe I'm still riding high on rediscovering childhood favorites...but one of my goals for this Summer is to track down these movies and have them ready for Aiden to enjoy. He'll enjoy them, and until he can...I, apparently, am really enjoying Sesame Street's re-entrance into my life.
You know you're a Dad when, right?
Thursday, June 01, 2006
Done & Done!
Last day of classes at the GLC.
To say its nice to be done is an understatement.
I wore an Aloha shirt and shorts to class today. I think that says it all.
To say its nice to be done is an understatement.
I wore an Aloha shirt and shorts to class today. I think that says it all.
Soup, anyone?
We went to the La Mirada City Library yesterday.
Its been years since I had a regular library card, at a normal library complete with children's books, Young Adult, etc. Whenever I have the chance, I like to catch up on old friends. So, yesterday I took a few minutes to walk the aisles of the children's section, looking for the books I used to covet when I was in elementary school.
And then it dawned on me.
They'll have Soup.
Soup was one of my favorites growing up.
Soup on Ice.
Soup in Love.
Soup on Fire.
Soup & Me.
Soup's Uncle
I really enjoyed Robert Newton Peck's writing. Though it wasn't a "Soup" book, A Day No Pigs Would Die was also a book that left a lasting impression on my childhood.
Interestingly, as I looked up links for all of these classics, I found yet another that I may have to revisit now that I have a library card...How to Eat Fried Worms.
Then there's Freckle Juice.
Its amazing what you can find when you start down the path.
Its been years since I had a regular library card, at a normal library complete with children's books, Young Adult, etc. Whenever I have the chance, I like to catch up on old friends. So, yesterday I took a few minutes to walk the aisles of the children's section, looking for the books I used to covet when I was in elementary school.
And then it dawned on me.
They'll have Soup.
Soup was one of my favorites growing up.
Soup on Ice.
Soup in Love.
Soup on Fire.
Soup & Me.
Soup's Uncle
I really enjoyed Robert Newton Peck's writing. Though it wasn't a "Soup" book, A Day No Pigs Would Die was also a book that left a lasting impression on my childhood.
Interestingly, as I looked up links for all of these classics, I found yet another that I may have to revisit now that I have a library card...How to Eat Fried Worms.
Then there's Freckle Juice.
Its amazing what you can find when you start down the path.
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